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Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: November 01, 2011 05:19 AM · On: Chapter 13: Not What One Would Expect

Mega Meat, King Dong, Strawberries and Goldilocks... oh my!  What a trip.  I really thought I could hold my tea but darn if it didn't go spewing with the Meat Packing Industry glib.  I tried to hold it in and it just made it worse.  Middle of the Night laughing stifled by a two hand cover up.  <Priceless>

Fab Girl you are so FAB!

Author's Response:

It's me again!

Glad you liked chapter 13 and The Adventures of Edward and The King Kong Dong. So now you know, after nearly spewing your tea that those disclaimers/cautionary warnings are there for a reason. LOL I'm glad you got the giggles (guffaws??) about Emmett not wanting some girl to think that he and edward were in the Meat Packing Industry. I thought that was pretty good, if I do say so myself. I can just picture Emmett saying that kind of stuff.

Thanks for the fab review. You yourself are pretty darn FAB!


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: November 01, 2011 04:48 AM · On: Chapter 12: Post Time

Yes, the intrigue is driving me mad that I can't read any faster! <wringing hands in breathless anticipation> 

How do you do that?  You are the master story maker!  And I am your drooling fan.  I love it.   


Author's Response:

You just make me squee like a fangirl with your glowing compliments. I'm humbled while squeeing, though.

Thanks for the storylove!


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: November 01, 2011 04:26 AM · On: Chapter 11: Days of Reckoning

uh oh... Bella messed up big time.... and suprise Edward gets a wake up call too.  hmm I am so loving this story!  

I had to stop a couple of days ago and have been thinking about what is going to happen ever since.  I can't wait to read how Bella and Edward are going to work it all out! 

Author's Response:

Hi pmav!

I lagged myself for a bit on the replies. meanwhile, you have been covering some ground!

I loved hearing that you were contemplating what might take place next in the story before you were finally able to read the next chapter.

Thanks for the great reviews.


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 09:53 PM · On: Chapter 10: Into the Lair

Sacrebleu!  Holey Moley Naughty Singing Bitch Girl.  You are in the web now.

Oh I love reading Saturdays without a good book to read.  Lucky me I happened on this story.  I'm so in it I can't stop now.  The laundry can always wait.

Author's Response:

Sacrebleu to you too! She is one naughty, singing bitch girl, isn't she? Now she's a naughty, prowling, praying, singing bitch girl besides. I'm glad you are enjoying the story and even gladder I could keep you from doing something nasty like laundry. Yecch! That's nearly as bad as vaccuuming! Dust bunnies will wait like dirty clothes, though, I find.

Thanks for the reviews.


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 07:56 PM · On: Chapter 8: Departures

Dickward is digging deep and finding his inner Edward.... I love it.  Bella is already lost to him and just hasn't figured it all out yet.  


Author's Response:

Thank goodness there is an inner Edward...the external choice, though nice to look, at leaves something to be desired. We'll have to hope Bella can help him find a nice balance.

Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 07:19 PM · On: Chapter 7: Aide-de-Camp Black

Who knew the Dickmobile would get them "moving" together.  hmmm even more delicious as the plot thickens.

Author's Response:

The Dickmobile...such a penis car. LOL And now that I've had that thought and I'm reading about the plot thickening...I think I need to go lie down for a bit. Whew! ;)

Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 06:49 PM · On: Chapter 6: Moving Right Along

Thanks for the belly laughs.  Delightful.  Mon Dieu! What a unique dance of love.  I'm enjoying it tremendously.

Author's Response:

MonDieu! indeed. lol Keep your Mon Dieu's in mind for coming chapters. ;)

Thanks again!

Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 05:54 PM · On: Chapter 5: From Bad to Unimaginably Worse

Poor limpy Dickward... payback is always hell but at least he has a sense of humor about it.  

Can't wait to read the next adventures of the Dickcave and singing Bitch girl

Author's Response:

WOW pmav, you are moving right along! Yeah...limpy Dickward isn't all hot and hard right now! Payback is a bitch. I love "the Adventures of the Dickcave and Singing Bitch Girl"

Thanks for the review and the giggle.


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 05:04 PM · On: Chapter 4: Mr. Silk Pants a.k.a. Mr. Big Stuff

Mr. Silk Pants Big Stuff.  A story within a story... how unique and fun!  Love it Love it Love it!!!  

You have me totally hooked. 

Author's Response:

Hi again, pmav!

Glad you are still enjoying Mr. Silk Pants aka Mr. Big Stuff. I still think that song from time to just seems so appropriate for this story. Thanks for the love, love, love!!! Hope to hear from you again soon.


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 04:31 PM · On: Chapter 3: If the Hat Fits, Wear It

Could never call him Dickless.  But Asshole seems to fit the bill...  pardon the pun.  I love it.  sexy - fun - and with laughter... my kind of story!

Author's Response:

Hi pmav!

Yep, for now, Asshole does fit the bill. Thanks for the love and thanks for the review.


Reviewer: ToMyMuse (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 04:17 PM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

I love Midnight Sun!

(And thanks for the reply! I'm such a dork--I was so tickled to receive it.)

Author's Response:

Hi again, TMM!

See...if you love both Midnight Sun and the books through Bella's eyes, you like getting both perspectives! At least that's how I feel. Actually, the first thing I tried writing was a continuation of Midnight Sun (just for myself...I didn't post that).

And getting a reply from a you know how I feel getting a review: Tickled!

Thanks again!


Reviewer: ToMyMuse (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 03:48 PM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

Your writing is so satisfyingly good, I can't help but feel frustrated when I finish a chapter so quickly. 

I absolutely love Edward's inner arguments and dialogue. So funny, yet also helpful--it shows how Edward is analyzing himself and realizing how he is culpable in what happened. 

I was reading an online wiki site recently--it pointed out how the book Twilight differs from the movies. Mind you, I am a late bloomer when it comes to Twilight--I saw the first two movies before I read the books. So I happen to love all the movies (tho the first has such lame special effects and RPat seemed to overact at times.) But there are some key things that make me love the books so much more---the character development, inner dialogues, and especially Bella's character--meaning, her selflessness, her insecurities, her intelligence, how well she takes care of herself and Charlie. She's so mature yet innocent. 

Sorry, longwinded, I'll wrap up. Anyway, your writing evokes a similar feeling--I am totally invested in your B&E and care what happens to them. 

Thank you. 

PS. Can't wait to

Author's Response:

Hi ToMyMuse

Thank you for such a great review. And thank you for the compliment. I'm glad you are liking my style and what I have to say.

I was a relatively late bloomer to Twilight too, although I read the book before I saw the first movie. And I think you are right, the book has some key things that you just can't get in a movie. Since it was told through Bella, we got all of her thoughts and her character was defined by much more than her actions and words. Without the book I might have been slightly disappointed in the movie...there are some things that seem stilted or overacted and yet, because my mind is thinking of what was in the book I can excuse that. Twilight is my second favorite book. Midnight Sun (have you read it?) is my favorite, although Stephenie Meyer never finished it. I absolutely loved Edward's thoughts in it...his wry sense of humor and his extreme thoughts. I think that's why I love to ponder the EPOV in what I write. He was such a self-basher and so negative about so many things, but mostly humorously so. So that is where I am coming from. And I am glad you get the "Twilighty" feeling from what I write. Thank you for caring about my version of the characters.

And thank you for your review!


Reviewer: pmav (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 03:39 PM · On: Chapter 2: A New Chapter in Her Life

LOVE the hat trick.  Original, humorous and mentally enticing.  Can't wait to read more.  Excellent.

Reviewer: silly sad sarah twilighted (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 01:40 PM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

Finallt Edward is processing it all with his head screwed on right although mentally he seems to have some help taking on a ulti persoanlity can become an issue lmao!!!  Can't wait for more squee!

Author's Response:

Hi ssst!

Edward's head may finally be screwed on right, but the inside of his head seems rather screwy, right? lol He may need some counseling by the time this story is through.

Thanks for the squee!


Reviewer: nightline (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 07:15 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

I think you should add one more warning: "Don't read with your laptop on your lap." I actually dropped it because I laughed so hard at "Well, at least we're all agreed"...

Where do we go from here? I'm guessing Bella is going to work through her experience by writing it down, and Edward is either going to find her story (though that seems quite unlikely) or is going to get over himself and try to apologize - which probably won't go too well... I can't wait to find out what YOU decided will happen next! :-)

Author's Response:

Hi nightline!

Glad you liked Edward's schizophrenic multi-voiced mental conversation. Mental is perhaps the key word here. lol Hope your laptop is healing from its nasty bump. I like your thoughts on where the story is going from here. I think you'll like my thoughts when I post them. ;)

Thanks for the giggle. I'll add to the disclaimer/warnings.


Reviewer: HockeyChick (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 05:19 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

The phone convo between Belle and Angela is just like my bff and me. I'm the Angela lol. I had this image of Edward talking to himself in the mirror like in Snow White and The Seven Dwarves lol. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the assholest/dickiest man of them all? lol

Author's Response:

Hi HC!

Sorry I've been terrible recently about review replies. I loved your review of this chapter. I think we've all had those conversations with a best friend where we tell every sordid detail, trying to figure things out. I'm glad you're an Angela. We all need our Angelas. I loved the Snow White mirror thoughts. Maybe the fairlytale version of this story would be Checkered Past and the Seven Heavenly Perversions (hot tub with twinkle lights, scream-gasm handles in shower, four-poster bed with those oh-so-sturdy posts, sex-wedge, blindfold, handcuffs, the 'other' mirror-mirror-on-the-wall). I'd do Checkered Past in a heartbeat. ;)

Thanks for the giggles.


Reviewer: briandelight (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 04:42 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

Ha ha, this is great. Poor Edward's just as confused as Bella. They're so alike and they don't realize it. Hopefully, Edward will apologize and they can all get over this small bump in their road.

Author's Response:

Hi b!

Glad you liked chapter 18. You're right, B & E are both quite a like in their turmoil-filled thoughts. They do need to get past this bump so they can get on to other, more fulfilling bumps. And grinds. And sighs. And moans. And groans. I'm all hot and bothered. lol

Thanks for the review. Sorry I've failed lately at the replies.


Reviewer: awheeler7 (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 03:35 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

Wow the pair of them could observe the world and the world would go crazy wondering what they meant! XD lol loved the chapter! Can't wait for more!

Author's Response:

They have no idea just how much they would both understand each other if they could just get together, right?'s a slippery process, just as slippery as a satin duvet. lol

Thanks for the review.


Reviewer: little frog (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 03:13 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

can't wait to see how he makes it up to her... and her to him....

Thanks for writing!

Author's Response:

Hi little frog

Thank you for the review. There will be smiles in the next chapter. I promise.


Reviewer: JavaMasta (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 01:32 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

I've been enjoying your tongue-in-cheek style and the characters' inner dialogues.  Oh, and this was pricelss:  "And he wasn't just a ridiculously handsome, world renowned, British actor look-alike."

Author's Response:

Hi JavaMasta!

Thanks for the review and kind words. I'm glad you are enjoying the way I tell my tale. And I just can't stop myself from poking fun at all of us and our they in the fanfic world or wrapped up in the trappings of a ridiculously handsome, world-reknowned, British actor. ;)

Keep in touch!


Reviewer: RandyWriter (Signed) · Date: October 29, 2011 12:12 AM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

This was such an interesting chapter.   To hear Edward's inner dialogue...damn...could write a book with just those conversations.   Little manwhore on one shoulder...little good boy on the other.   Damn...those two constantly torturing him, and then Edward's own voice coming out to argue with the two of them...ROFL.   You never cease to amaze me when you write inner dialogue.   I keep from eating and drinking always when I read it!!!   Loved it!   It was really interesting how upset Bella was with her snooping and how her life was basically   She was so honest with Angela, and that had to be embarassing.     But she did it.    She admitted everything.   Now see him throw his keys across the room (worrying about the paint of course immediately)  LOL!   How Edward started out so completely upset, feeling violated I think more than anything, but then, as the night and inner voice fights went on....Edward started realizing what a dick he was ...and how Bella just did what he did to Bella, but not quite in the same manner.  Edward had been looking around Bella's house, and in her classroom.   He realizes that he is a bit of a manwhore.   That Bella was right, and when she was walking across the street..he realized how hurt and upset Bella was for her berhavior, and it seemed to bother Edward.  It kind of surprised me.   When these two finally get together...DAMN...HOT TIMES IN THE CITY!!  Yeah..the song just came to    Edward may be changing his ways...and it all has to do with Bella.   Time for some loving...hmmmm.   Write again to make my night, when you can!   Love it all!  

Author's Response:

Hi RW!

I'm sorry I have been a failure lately at the review replies. I'm still loving the reviews, of course.

I'm glad you enjoyed chapter 18 and Edward's inner chaos. I love the idea of a tiny manwhore speaking into one ear and a little angelicward speaking into the other. I love the inner dialogue. you know that about me. lol

We already know from Bella's teary reaction to the Asshole hat Edward purchased online for her that she feels wretched about what she's done. At least now she doesn't have to live with being a deceitful liar as well...she completely unburdened herself. Twice! And Angela is probably so thankful for her own rather boring existence if Bella's life is the other choice. lol

Edward was pissed at her and pissed at what she probably thought but it is his own damn fault that she would think what she might be thinking. Yeah, he's not too happy with himself right now. And seeing poor B in her trek across the street, at least we got that through his eyes and know he's feeling quite remorseful. We'll have to see how he attempts to make this situation better. ;)

Thanks for the review(s)! And the love!


Reviewer: CanadianMommmyX2 (Signed) · Date: October 28, 2011 11:39 PM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

I think one thing that makes a writer a good writer is that they make you feel something for their characters.  Rather than just tell a story, you feel like you are a part of it.  I must admit as Edward described Bella crossing the street to return his stuff I felt my eyes fill up with tears.  I felt so bad for both of them.  As much as I think Bella was wrong for invading Edward's privacy (although I probably would have been tempted to do the same thing), I actually felt sorry for her when you described her hugging herself as she walked across the street. I could picture it so clearly in my mind and it made my heartache for her.

I loved Edward's inner monologue.  I just finished re-watching the Lord of the Rings, it made me think of Gollum talking to himself while leading the hobbits into Mordor.

I am glad Edward seems to be changing.  He has realized he was an ass, and is slowly redeeming himself in my eyes.  Maybe he needs to attend "The Transfer's Edward's" classes on how to treat a woman.  He seemed to know what he is doing.  Hopefully this Edward will see the light and get there soon.

I think these two need to start over.

I look forward to reading more


Author's Response:

Hi CanMom!

I've been so terrible about replying to reviews. I'm so sorry! Work has been so hectic and for some reason, through i can read my reviews from Twilighted at work, I can't reply and then by the time I get home i am dead and am moving on to other things. Anyhoo...your review came in the nick of time. I just wrote a rather snippy reply back to a reader a few reviews befoe yours so it was nice to read something from you to calm me back down. Thank you for your kind words.

I really try to show not just the action, but the inner thoughts and the growth process. i'm glad you can appreciate that. I'm glad to know you were touched by the thought of Bella, crossing the great divide to bring Edward's things home to him. The good thing is...that Bella was seen through Edward's he feels the remorse and the sadness...or he's projecting his feelings onto her. There is hope for The Beast after all.

Glad you liked Edward's inner musings/diaglogue/conference call. Edward is a little more attractive than Gollum, no? But I did see what you were saying. lol

Perhaps The Transfer Edward can hold classes for his poorly behaved namesakes, instructing them in flower symbolism and the ways to woo a woman.

Thanks for the kind words and the uplifting results.

love ya, CM!


Reviewer: DaSrO (Signed) · Date: October 28, 2011 09:51 PM · On: Chapter 5: From Bad to Unimaginably Worse

^"You just can't canoodle with a dick like…a noodle." LOL owe you a story, right now I got to get up and make dinner for my parents..I know, what a wild Friday night =-P

Reviewer: DaSrO (Signed) · Date: October 28, 2011 09:24 PM · On: Chapter 4: Mr. Silk Pants a.k.a. Mr. Big Stuff

LOL I did listen to the song =-P oh,how I wish your story wouldnt go to make those two neighbors fall in love, I really wish...but we all know that wouldnt be the point hehe its just that I have had that neighbor, and that asshole will always be an asshole,he's such an asshole that he went and made friends with my family and friends and remained their friend after breaking my heart. I've such hilarious stories with that guy that I would give you a run for yur money LOL. Next time your story makes me cry from laughing I'll tell you one of my RL stories with my exneighbor asshole hehe really freat story, so funny I didnt take to review the first chapters, sorry for that, but in a way its a compliment: thats just how engrossing and funny your story is =-)

Have a great weekend


Reviewer: angelblue (Signed) · Date: October 28, 2011 09:16 PM · On: Chapter 18: Do the (After)Math

I think rehashing for the reader should be more like remembering one or two details not reliving the whole chapter. That was way over fking kill. so please ...move on.

Author's Response:

I appreciate the commentary. I don't appreciate the tone. I give up my entire weekend and many hours during the week to write what I think is important to the storyline and character development. Of course I don't reallyknow what I'm doing. I'm not a writer by trade. Maybe you don't like a chapter here or there. And I get that...that's fine. Perhaps you could word your criticisms more kindly. Or read something else.

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