Hehehe! I really enjoyed the chapter. It made me laugh. I actually have a bit of Suzie in me and I have had to work really hard on not saying exactly what I think of ineptitude and inefficiency. Tina was awesome with her negotiating skills. I really look forward to Rob's visit to Staples. Thanks!

 

Happy Mother's day!!!!

Author's Response:

Hey, Catalina!  I'm glad you liked the chapter.  You know I love these characters and both of their stories, but this one just makes me chuckle all the time, and I'm actually a bigger fan of that than I am of the schmexin'!  These girls at Staples was originally about five or six paragraphs in my outline, but they just went off the deep end.  Suzie has a way with the sales staff - by the time she's done with them, I think they hate their names as much as they hate their life.

I think we all have a bit of Suzie in us.  For me, she's the voice in my head I've been suppressing all my life!  So I know exactly what you mean.  Tina's job is such that she's had to negotiate quite a bit.  In truth, this particular negotiation was pretty easy.  You should see her buy a car!

Happy Mother's Day (belated) to you!  I hope you enjoyed your day.  Thanks for reading and reviewing both stories!  I love your feedback!

Suzie's shopping attitude reminds me of my husband.  He always does his research before he gets to the store, so he almost always knows more than the employees.  I worked retail for YEARS, so I always kindly remind him that the poor sales person has pobably had NO real training and he or she is doing the best they can, so be nice.  Hubby is British so he's always POLITE, but sometimes he forgets to be NICE.  If he didn't mostly shop with me around he would A) never decide what he wanted and B) Scare entire stores full of retail slaves.  Once again, great chapter, I love Suzie, Tna, Frannie, and of course Rob.  My 4 year old son, Ewan lectures me all the time.

 

Love,

Em

Author's Response:

That's funny, Em!  My husband is a big researcher, but then he's a total noodle when we get to the store.  So even if he KNOWS what they are telling him isn't true, he just stands there.  Of course, when it comes time to do the big stuff, like buying a car, he has fun, because he does all the research but I do the negotiating.  The sales people assume he's the "money-man" so they always come back to talk to him, even though I'm the one who asked the questions that sent them scurrying to the back room in the first place.  The last car we bought, he finally (after probably the third trip to the back where I sent them away and they came back and addressed him) said to them:  "You do realize that EVERY time she asks a question and you come back and give ME the answer it costs you money, right?"  The guy nearly spewed his coffee.  It was brilliant.

Usually at the end, he tells the guy "She negotiates with Teamsters for a living... don't feel bad."  It entertains me.  But I'm very nice to retail employees.  I worked for The Home Depot for almost five years.  Those poor employees have to work hard.  You're absolutely right - they are thrown out there as "experts" with very little training.

It's funny that you say he'd never decide.  My sister-in-law is like that.  She can "shop" forever but never makes a decision.  I hate shopping, so I do my research, decide what I want, pay, and I'm done with it.  She'll say "but what if you see something you like better?"  Easy.  I'm done looking, so that's not going to happen.  I doubt I'll ever be accosted by a cheaper or more attractive sofa on a street corner.  I'm good.

My five year old daughter Joanna lectures me regularly.  Has for years.  I know that Frannie is real because I live with her counterpart!

Thanks for reading and reviewing, Em!  I really appreciate it and love your feedback.

Ok, Kris...that's the first time that I almost spewed my coffee from the damn Author's Notes at the beginning of a story!!!!  ROFL!!!  That was great!!  And the end bit between Rob and Tina was perfect!!!  LOVED IT!!!  : )

Author's Response:

Hey, Teddi!  I'd say I'm sorry about the spew, but it makes my heart sing to know I got you laughing in the author's notes!  Thanks so much!

This chapter FLEW out of me once I had it gelled in my head.  I just had this image of Suzie as a madwoman in Staples.  My inspiration was going to Michael's with a crafty friend of mine and seeing her eyes kind of glaze over.  I also worked for The Home Depot for almost five years, and during that time I saw a lot of people walk through the store like they were cocaine addicts on a field trip to Colombia.  I tried to bring as much of that lunacy as possible to the story.

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!  I'm glad you joined us last night at the virtual happy hour.  We're a little nutty but we have fun!  If you liked the end scene between Rob and Tina then I can't wait for you to see the next chapter.  This story has one or two chapters left, depending on how things play out in Chapter 5.  See you tomorrow for LOC!

the Dickster...oh how i love you... poor RL Nick... we paint him so...colorfully...

and the NDA..i am glad Suzie made both Rob AND Tina aware she would not be disclosing any info about the two.

I love Staples... really i do. I love the smell of invisible tape... and the Sharpies... OMG... even the second time... poor Jeff. yes, she is kinda scary!

OMG.... this made me pee! poor Timmy! BWHAHAA

"Timmy?"  She looked at him and quirked her eyebrows.  "Just a tip, Sparky... you might want to switch to Tim soon.  I think you're probably already relationship-challenged enough without sounding like you're seven.  You know?"  The young man's eyes were widening as she spoke, and he nodded mutely at her.

crying... needs a lot of highlighters, does he? heheheheheheeeee

oh my... that whole interaction with Rob and frannie... seriously that made my ovaries hurt... and i'm done with kids... but that... that made me want them... holy cow...

and then the interaction with Rob and tina right after... so in love with your Rob... sigh....

great job my dear... i cannot WAIT until the credit card exchange! EXCITING!!!

oh i love u. i love this story. i love staples... i love Suzie...

oh an Brute Squad? oh ET.. i gotta send something over to you...

best wishes on this Mother's Day my dear! 

love you!

MWAH!

steph

 

Author's Response:

Hey, Steph!  First off, Happy Mother's Day to you, too, ET!  Thanks for taking time to read from your day of, I hope, being pampered.  Yeah, Nick definitely gets a beating in ficLand, doesn't he?  For all we know, he tries really hard to manage all this stuff and Rob's just not cooperative, but I can't believe that.  Plus, this is far more fun.  And Suzie is nickname girl, so she has to come up with something.

We got a glimmer of the NDA back in LOC, when Rob and Tina were both surprised at how much she knew about the other one's feelings but never disclosed.  That girl should get a job working for the CIA or something.  She kept those confidences when it had to have killed her.  Particularly after the divorce proceedings ended and Tina moved to LA.  Can you imagine listening to Rob pining for Tina, then Tina trying to avoid Rob, knowing that if the two of them would just fucking talk to one another, things would all fall into place?  Talk about being between a rock and a hard place.  Those girls sure know how to stick to an agreement.  Of course, knowing that sure makes the thought of "let's be open" take on a whole new tone.  She doesn't do anything halfway.

The whole Staples trip... really just gelled in my brain once I got them into the store.  I know you'll understand that.  There are parts of it that, when I was rereading, made me think "who the hell wrote this?"  Unbelievable.  Man, when a story just owns you... wow.  Suzie freakin' owns me, that's for sure.  They all do, but she has something I can't explain.  That edge.  It's the inner voice I've been suppressing my whole life, I think.  And having third person for the whole thing just makes it all worthwhile.  Does ANYONE meet Suzie and NOT think "she's kind of scary?"

Frannie is definitely going to have the Curse, don't you think?  Waggling her little finger at him for breaking the scene?  Too funny!  I like to think that Rob had a pretty great childhood, given how tight he seems to be with his family, so I thought he'd want to be sure Frannie has one as well.  I just think he'd remind her to have fun and not be so serious... another lesson I think he may have learned from his friendship with Kristen, who lived the Hollywood child star life enough that I seriously doubt she had any kind of normal childhood.

Isn't it amazing how much these two are on the same page and NOT on the same page as often as they are?  When he asks her if she's changed her mind?   My heart breaks for both of them, but I'll say it forever... what I like about these characters is that they do the right thing.  They both have strong moral compasses and they sacrifice their own immediate wants/needs to do what is in line with their own personal ethics.  Thank heavens they manage to stay in each other's worlds long enough to make that connection eventually.  But how many of us can look back at a connection that didn't form because of circumstances and wonder "what if?" because we did what was right?

The Brute Squad email?  All I can say is, imagine how scary we are going to be when both halves of the brain are in the same room?

Love you, my ET!  Thanks for everything.  BTW - Teddi said she spewed on the Chapter A/N.  That could be a new record for us!

jeez, my brain is thick. lol you keep mentioning this story and i'm like, huh? now i get it. duh. lol

 

Author's Response:

Hey, Em!  I know the feeling - trust me!  I'm just glad you found it.  I've been having a lot of fun with this little companion novella, and I love the third person POV so we can see what's going on in everybody's heads.

I hope you like it!  It's just some laughs and a little more realistic view of Rob when he and Tina first meet, with some hardcore Suzie in the mix for some real fun and excitement.  Lots of folks wondered why Rob and Suzie have such an unusual relationship, and hopefully this explains it.

Thanks for reading, reviewing, and finding TC!

Rob would TOTALLY put up with a PA who called him a dick. It's not like she doesn't say it with affection.

And yeah, good point about his defensiveness. I didn't actually take it that way, but I can see it now. i can see most things when handed a flashlight and pointed in the right direction.

Hey - be sure to read my forum post for TPF before tomorrow's call, 'kay?

:) K

Author's Response:

Of COURSE she says it with affection.  I can't wait for you to see her trip to Staples, though.  She's not perfect but she's certainly entertaining!  I totally understand what you're saying in the TPF post (because I have read it - yay for gag rules being lifted and all!).  There are things that happen with characters that the author knows because the entire universe exists in her head, but the reader only sees in glimpses.  I think of it like watching what's happening on the other side of the train platform through the windows of the train cars that pass between the platforms.  You THINK you can see everything, but you have to know that someone standing on the other side is going to have a much better view of what goes on over there then you can looking through those windows.  The glimpses may meld into constant motion in your mind, but they really are just glimpses.

And so, people think Suzie is over the top, but we now know that she's really not, and it's just their dynamic.  Rob may seem all put together in LOC, but we really know that he was a complete mess when we first "met him."  Lucky for him (and unlucky for us) we saw him through the eyes of someone who was just way more messed up than he was.  Even luckier, he met some people who helped him figure out how to get his shit under a lot more control before we spent any extensive time with him.  He got some semblence of his life back.

Just remember that sometimes you have to give the rest of us a flashlight and point us in the right direction.  And SOMETIMES you have to start wide-eyed at the screen like at the end of Sixth Sense and replay whole scenes in your head going "WTF?  IDEK!"  So what seems OOC may not be OOC, and it's just not time for us to know.  As long as it's not so prevalent that you throw the book across the room, that's actually part of what makes the storyteller worth paying attention to.  IMHO, anyway.

So I'm stoked for the call, because I really hope we get to have this discussion.  Sometimes the answer to our comments might be:  "Really?  I can see how you think that.  I can assure you it's not OOC, but the real question is, is it so distracting you can't proceed?  Because soon you'll find out that it's not OOC, it's just not one of the layers of her that you've seen."  And that's what makes this whole process so cool to me.  *mwah*

well, I should let you know that I don't eat red meat or pork and generally we also use wheat pasta, because we eat a lot of it and I'm trying to keep the Old Man's blood sugar down (much to his annoyance). So, mine would automatically be lighter, but perhaps not as tasty.

So...do I understand that you are still going  to Vegas? And what travels  are you commited to this week?

 

K

Author's Response:

When I have our Super Bowl party, one of our guests is a vegetarian so I make veggie lasagna.  But the cheese is what kills it, I think.  I've made it with a white wine and vegetable broth instead of a bechamel, spinach and broccoli rather than meat, and sundried tomatoes dotted through the ricotta.  But really, once you fill it with ricotta and bechamel and top it with mozzarella, it's kind of a lost cause, isn't it?

We're talking about Vegas for fun when Bel Ami opens (a whole bunch of us from all over doing a meet-up there), but I know have Las Vegas as a site, so I'll be there several times a year at a minimum.  Not sure exactly when yet, but sometime during the summer I'm sure.  This week, I go to Tampa on Tuesday and come back Thursday.  Leaving at 8am (gah) but coming back at a somewhat reasonable 7pm.

I just keep chanting "frequent flier miles."

Kris, I love this little world you've created so damn much.  Can I live in it?  I want to be Tina's best friend.  I want to hug Suzie and have her give me some advice.

 

Love you,

Em

Author's Response:

Em, there are days when I want to live in it full-time.  I'm happy to escape there everyone once in a while, though!  It makes me blush to know that you like it that much, too!

I need Suzie to kick my ass, and I need Tina to be my diet and exercise instructor.  I have GOT to get back on the wagon - err, elliptical - soon!  But I hear you, girlfriend!

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, Emily.  So glad these characters are real to you!  That makes it all worthwhile.

Fun? What fun?

Yeah, so obviously I am  terrible friend,  having not left a review yet. My most sincere and effervesent apologies, madam. But the good news is that I adore this little  glimpse into the other side. And you're working the Third Person like a champ, oh Omniscient One.

My only complaint is that I swear each of your chapters make me hungry.  And this one may well have made me gain three pounds.

Now gimme the meal deets.

xoxo
ikss

Author's Response:

Hey, ikss, baby!  Like you don't have anything else going on?  And you still have to tell me how Thursday went, btw!  I'm just happy you have time to read - you can give me your two cents whenever.  Like now!  Thanks for loving the POV.  I tell you, it's liberating.  I hope I'm working it right, because I really love it.  What I loved the most, though, was the homage to the black and tan.  We are beer girls, aren't we?

You didn't have any fun?  I feel like Ferris Bueller.

Nonna's gravy is really versatile, so if you make it, you have to really use it all up, you know?  Thank goodness family recipes can't be sucked out of your head after a divorce.  She might have agreed to stay with Lou just to keep the gravy recipe!

So the deal with the meal is that, when I was in college, I wanted to make lasagna but the kitchen's didn't exactly cater to lasagna prep.  Mind you, this was before I learned the real secret of lasagna noodles, but I digress.  So instead of making lasagna noodles, I'd make penne or bowtie pasta, and I'd use really thin layers, then put the "filling" layers of the lasagna in between.  PLUS, I'd use foil loaf pans, so I could do lots of layers and they were easy to store in the freezer without taking up tons of space.  You could feed three girls or a girl and a guy with one loaf pan lasagna.  Of course, Tina didn't have to resort to the loaf pan, but that's what she was making.  Thin layer of pasta, thin layer of cheese, thin layer of pasta, thin layer of sliced meatballs, thin layer of pasta, melted mozzarella on the top.  Bake until cheese melts and starts to brown.

So did you just gain two more pounds reading the review response?  The next chapter only has pretzels, I swear.  Lots of office supplies, but only pretzels.

Love ya, darlin!  Thanks for reading and reviewing, and thanks for being my bud!  Laters, baby~

Another great chapter! It almost sounded like Tina was making lasagna but whatever it was it sounded wonderful!

Author's Response:

Hi, Teddi!  You win (sort of)!  When I was in college and had dorm room kitchen access, I made this version of lasagna because I didn't have all the tools and space I needed to boil lasagna noodles and drain them.  Of course, that was before I appreciated how much better it is to not boil the lasagna noodles at all, but that's a whole other story!  So I would make penne or bowties and make a think layer of pasta alternated with a thin layer of cheese or meat.  I would also be able to do it in any shape dish, so I'd use bread loaf pans.  Perfect size for two or three (depending on who the other person was - college guys really like to EAT, you know?) and I could make a bunch and freeze them.

Thanks for liking the chapter.  I'm really having a good time exploring this whole third person POV, and showing how Rob and Tina got their start, and how Suzie and Tina were able to set Rob on the path of reclaiming his life (for a little while, anyway).  I really appreciate you reading and reviewing.

Something tells me by the end of these stories, I'm going to have an LOC/TC cookbook!

kris he still wanted to date tina after dealing with susie for one day? love it on to the next chapter

Author's Response:

He's fearless, isn't he?  Actually, he started out counting on Tina to protect him, but after just one day, he's starting to see the advantages of having Suzie around.  At this stage, he has two fixations: the strange physical attraction/hum/buzz he feels when he's around her (and I've only had this twice in my life but can say without hesitation that I was drawn to both of those men like a moth to a flame - good thing I didn't know them at the same time! *snort*), and the fact that she seems to actually be more messed up than he is, and coping.  If nothing else, he wants to learn how to cope better, and it appears that she might be able to show him how.

Thanks for reading and reviewing.  I hope this is fun!

"He cringed when he saw old interviews of himself, old photos.  He'd never had much of a filter, but he had also not done his homework in the old days.  He said things that he shouldn't have said, wore the wrong clothes, partied too hard, and just wasn't careful enough.   In retrospect, it probably contributed to some of the attention he was still experiencing.  Because you never know what Robert Pattinson will say or do."

Kris - what a brilliant chapter girl! I absolutely loved this passage...so evident that there was media training between Twilight and New Moon. It's really funny though, because those interviews, the filterless phenomenon that was Robert Pattinson, was what I found most endearing about him. It was almost like he didn't think anything would come of this "little movie" he did and just let it all hang out there, thinking there would be no repercussions. Well, we all know how that turned out...bugger!

So glad to hear him stand up to Nick (that poor man...I think when you and Steph finish your stories we should send him a fruit basket or something...can you imagine? "WTF...who the hell are the Tri-O's?")

Is is wrong that I'm highly anticipating the trip to Staples? I didn't think so either...

And yes...that casserole sounded delicious! Share please!

Can I also just tell you that I giggled like a 12 year old imaging Steph as our "troop leader" and all of us in little brown uniforms! Although, imagine the things we could do for the merit badges...

Love you! Miss you!

~Tracy

Author's Response:

Oh, Tracy, I so agree!  The reason I was so drawn to him in the first place was the filterless, fidgeting, lost-looking young man.  I wanted so desperately to help him navigate everything.  Endearing is the perfect word.  Charming as well.  I would have to agree - if you see the interviews that TomStu did for Pirate Radio (with the exceptions of the parts where he has to avoid questions about Rob) there's a lot of similarity.  He seems to be having some fun, thinking "let's change it up a bit, give them something different."  It's all fun and games until someone is allergic to a vagina, you know?

What I like about him standing up to Nick here is that he really just says "do your job - no more, no less."  The real problem, I think, is that Nick had too many jobs, and they were in conflict.  Now he's in the job he's most qualified to hold - manager - and someone else will help with the real life stuff.  Suzie won't be perfect - trust me when I tell you that Suzie in Staples is not unlike Keith Richards at an opium farm - but she gives him blinding clarity for some things he really needs to see.  I love her to death, but she's immature, irrational, boisterous, and a bit scary at times.  Then again, the state that he's in right now, subtlety probably would have been lost on him.

The shame of it all is that Tina is such a wreck that she's barely processing everything that's really going on.  Damn shame, cuz that boy is warm for her form.  Silly woman.

I am right there with you on the troop imagery.  Maybe when we go to Vegas we can sell cookies!  One night, we're going to have to think up the merit badges - brilliant idea!

The casserole was something I came up with in college when I didn't have the wherewithal to make lasagna.  Of course, this was before I'd learned to not boil the noodles first, so I don't *have* to do this anymore as a shortcut, but since everyone loves it, I make it anyway.  Basically, instead of a layer of lasagna noodles, I use a thin layer of penne or bow tie pasta, with sauce.  Then I put dollops of ricotta and some grated parmesan, then another think layer of pasta, then a layer of sliced meatballs or sausage (if I'm really going crazy, I do a layer of meatballs, then the ricotta, then the sausage).  On the top, another layer of pasta and then a thin layer of sauce (gravy in my world, because if it has or had meat in it, it's gravy - marinara is sauce, bolognese is gravy - here endeth the lesson).  Sprinkle shredded mozzarella on the top, bake until lightly browned and bubbly.  Tastes like lasagna, serves up a little easier.  Now, for homemade gravy... well, you probably have to review the Staples chapter!

Love you, girlie!  Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!  See you Friday.  I promise I'll be around a bit this weekend.  Only one conference call (pfft).  Travel again next week, though.  *sigh* I miss my girls!  Tri-Os rock!

"Being incapable of any prolonged periods of quiet or inactivity, Suzie broke first.  She was amazed that she'd lasted as long as she did.  It had been less than a minute."

*snort*... I love her!

What a great chapter! I wish I had poured myself a beer (no light shit, of course!) while reading about Suzie's conversation with Nick...CLASSIC! It was great to see her taking care of Rob so quickly...he apparently does need the help. Just from what you've written here so far, and all I've read of LOC, it does seem like Rob has learned a bit from Suzie in trying to make some of his life his own (seeing Tina for her birthday and such), but it would take some Dienstag genes coursing through his veins to get him anywhere near her level of "confident." But, it is part of his charm...

Really enjoying this...love the 3rd person storytelling...I love seeing what all the characters are thinking, especially hearing Nick's thoughts upon first "meeting" Suzie.

Love ya Kris! Tri-O's forever!

~Tracy

Author's Response:

Hi, Tracy!  Are you still hiding in the closet?  Are you mentally reorganizing it while you're in there?  I'm peeking my head out of the bunker tonight, but this week will likely be nearly as bad as last week.

I'm so glad you liked this chapter.  She's such an amazing character... once she decided that he needed her and she could help him, it was like something clicked in her head.  At that point, she was going to do whatever it took.  The funny thing is, she talks about being an employee of Robert Pattinson, Inc., but from this point forward, all she cares about is the CEO.  Lots of other folks need to care about the overall financial success of the company, but she couldn't care less.

Can you imagine Suzie as a mother?  Look at how fierce she is with Rob, and she basically just "adopted him" that morning.  She would be the playground mom from hell, wouldn't she?  He learns a great deal from both of them.  That's really what I hope to show in TC (in addition to some real laughs).  Right now, I'm writing the shopping trip to Staples and I was laughing while I was writing it.  Oh my Lord!  I can't wait for you to see it!

I must say, the third person thing is the BEST.  I've been able to share little snippets from everyone's heads, and it makes things very entertaining.  Nick is really just doing his job.  Unfortunately for Rob, his job is to maximize the product, not take care of the person.  If Rob doesn't put his foot down, he's in real danger of being completely wrung out.  Suzie has to teach him that.  Someone has to teach Suzie balance.  Lots of people with lots to learn, right?

Thanks for reading and reviewing!  I so love our little Tri-O group!  Love you, too!  I hope you get out of the closet soon.  Have you found out yet whether it's Nipples or Dicks?  (heh heh!)  I really hope it's the Dicks!!!  I'm selfish that way.  I know it will probably be Jax, but a girl can dream, right?  *mwah*